Without Apologies: The Essence of Being You

I don’t care who you are. You have quirks and not the ‘cute’ kind.

You possess characteristics that may drive some people up the wall, including yourself.

Maybe you’re a neat freak. Perhaps you blurt out words without thinking. Or, maybe you’re late everywhere…all the time, but it annoys you when others are late.

Whatever it is, you know exactly what I’m talking about.

It is easy to love another person’s ‘good’ attributes. You’re smart? Great. Funny? Fantastic. You’re active and have a body that shows it? Sexy.

But when we are more fully allowed into someone else’s persona, we are privy to the not so pretty.

We become acquainted with someone’s insecurities, with bad habits, and even with how life’s punches have shaped him or her.

And, as you learn more about another person, the other person is likewise learning more about you….and that can be scary.

Letting someone into our internal space takes courage.

It takes guts not to hide, not to play games; it takes guts to be unabashedly you.

To be honest with yourself, to be your honest self with others, to walk a line that is genuine to your essence regardless of consequences, that is an attribute worthy of praise.

There will be those who cannot hang with your adventurous and outgoing self, some who won’t want to deal with your nerdy obsession with comic books, others who will not want to understand your need for security.

There will be those who will choose to walk away when you are unapologetically you.

Let them walk.

All of those quirks, including those that you worked so hard on embracing and being comfortable with and those that you are currently working on improving, they are all worthy. They all make you enough. You are lovable.

The moment that you start altering who you are for someone else, whether a family member, a friend, a significant other, you stop being your authentic self. And you know it’s happening because it immediately feels wrong.

Those who make up your tribe, those who support and love you, they do so without conditions and boundaries. They choose to accept and recognize your amazingness.

And, when you meet those people, when you are surrounded by those who wouldn’t change a thing about you, even those annoying and pesky quirks, pure joy ensues.

There are few things that rival the feeling of being deeply loved for all you are.

But, you cannot get to that joy unless you have the courage to be your naked self without apologies.

It is an honor when you allow someone else into your vulnerable space. It is an honor that not everyone should receive by default, but rather one that is earned through trust and respect.

To allow someone to experience us in such an emotionally intimate manner is a gift,  but a gift so rare that we want to ensure that it lands with someone who can appreciate it the way it deserves – the way that you deserve.

Likewise, when someone gives us the gift of being unapologetically himself/herself, when we are given the ‘go’ to enter into rooms that few have been in, what privilege it is to have something so priceless bestowed upon us.

When two people enter the realm of getting to know each other beyond all that is on the surface and when they do so with the best intentions, with eagerness to see each other for all that they are, what magic occurs!




10 thoughts on “Without Apologies: The Essence of Being You”

  1. “There are few things that rival the feeling of being deeply loved for all you are.

    But, you cannot get to that joy unless you have the courage to be your naked self without apologies.”

    As someone with a business named ‘Naked Wellness,’ I fully embrace this message. 😉

    Also, as someone who just had a conversation with a close family member who told her he doesn’t ‘get’ the heart offering she is really excited about putting out in the world and doesn’t it will succeed… this is perfectly timed.

    He won’t walk because he is my father, but I’m not going to change myself or my convictions because of his opinion.

    Thank you for posting this at ‘just’ the right time!

  2. Thank you for writing and sharing this post! Embracing who we are is not an easy feat for us, yet necessary. Treasure the people who love us no matter what ❤

  3. Thank you for sharing this! Embracing my quirks has been something I’ve really been working on. I’ve spent so many years trying to hide them or change them, and that’s just exhausting and only making me sad.

    1. I think it really is a lifetime journey, Lisa! Fear or rejection, of not pleasing others, of being judged – these factors can all make it a challenge. But, the journey is half the experience anyhow. Glad to hear you’re working on embracing your wonderful self. 🙂

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