Continuing our love series, Sarah from Share My World takes us back to the basics by exploring how we define love. In our last love series post, many of you shared how you honor your time alone. I encourage you to jump into the conversation and share your thoughts on what love means to you.
What is love?
Over the past two weeks I’ve sat here trying to tailor this post to the true essence of love.
I’ve asked others what they thought, yet I wasn’t hearing what I was looking for. If I were to issue a fair analysis of all the answers I received, I would probably say that the majority of women and men that I asked did not understand my question.
“95% of women, including men, are conditioned to the societal idea of what love is.”
The more and more I began assessing the question and answers, I soon began to realize that we don’t know what we’re looking for. We don’t even know how to begin looking for it, and if we were to brush past it, the feeling would be foreign and therefore we’ll either sabotage or purposely reject it.
The fact of the matter is that we love the idea of someone, his or her potential, or what life with someone would look like.
That’s not love.
That’s an infatuation or an attachment.
A fairly new friend of mine, Aliya, who I met in Puerto Rico during New Year’s last year, shared her story about how she met her fiancé. Listening to her I thought I was reading a romantic novel. I was like a 12 year old child entrapped in her story, with eager eyes that screamed, tell me more!
I was amazed.
Just recently, she shared with me the advice she gave her work colleague who asked her how she and her fiancé (who lives in a different country) sustain their relationship.
She responded with, “You don’t sustain. You just be.”
And there it was right there! You just be. Organically refreshing, isn’t it?
I’m no expert, but here’s what I find love to look, feel, and sound like. I can be a bit confusing when explaining my thoughts sometimes, but I’m going to do my best to break it down as practically as I can. Bear with me.
Love is a little scary for me.
Because it constantly changes, evolves, and transmutes…sometimes without any warning, and you just have to adapt.
A small part of me would like to hold on to yesterday and extend tomorrow.
I don’t know what it is, but I like to intimately connect with whatever or whomever I’m interacting with. Therefore, I guess that creates some type of love, attachment, and melancholy fused into one.
Life is consistently changing, I’m consistently changing, and life and I will continue to change and that’s just something I’ll have to get used to.
All in all, here’s what I believe:
I believe love is a HUGE canvas of different colors, strokes, shapes, and sizes.
Love is being fully immersed, intertwined, and engaged in something or someone under no conditions what-so-ever.
Love is sacrificial, and sometimes sacrifice can be harsh – although love, like nature, never takes more than it needs. It’s both perfect and imperfect at the same time. Both are intimately related. Therefore, love comes with the acceptance that it will bring chaos. In retrospect, order.
Love is awareness; purity. A magnetic force that draws YOU, to who YOU are. Staying pure doesn’t mean to be untamed or untainted.
But to be pure is to be authentic, organic, and true to oneself, which leads me to my true definition of what love is.
“The greatest love of all is learning how to love yourself.” – WH
On a scale of 1 to 10, if someone was to ask me what love is, my number one answer would be, SELF-LOVE.
That was the answer I was looking for all along.
Self-love is a seed that grows into a tree of many branches. One important branch being self-awareness–the inner glow and foundation to all things.
I find it impossible to fully love someone, if someone isn’t consciously aware of the love or lack of love, they have for themselves.
It’s no question that love radiates from within. Therefore, love is the love you have for YOURSELF. It boils down to the highest sacrifice in life, which is to CHOOSE to love others as you love yourself.
“Only a man/woman whose heart is purely endowed and sedated in their own love can and will experience the true love that they desire.”- Sarah Lee
Sarah Lee is a connector, a blogger, and a personal, career, and business development consultant. She is the CEO and newly founder of Interconnected Consulting Services (ICS). Over 10 years, through observational study, Sarah has independently and theoretically built her expertise on personal success. Outside of her continuous study, Sarah enjoys traveling and learning about different cultures outside of her own. You’ll find her on her social sites personally sharing her tips on day to day life successes through her own experiences and observations.
She lives daily by her personal quote that says, “In all things, success will manifest with finding self; once you’ve found that, you’ve ultimately found success.”